An elderly woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car with that classic patronizing smirk and asked: “What’s your hurry?”
She replied. “I’m late for work.”
“Oh yeah.” Said the cop, ‘what do you do?”
“I’m a R*ctum Stretcher.” She responded.
The cop stammered. “A what?”
“A R*ctum Stretcher!”
“And just what does a r*ctum stretcher do?”
“Well.” She said.
“I start by inserting one finger in the r*ctum, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in and then I slowly, but surely stretch it, until it’s about 6 feet”
“And just what the hell do you do with a 6-foot a*sehole?” He asked.
“You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge!”
